As I keep understanding better why women stay in domestic violent relationships I thought it would be interesting what signs people should be aware off before it leads to domestic violence. Based on domesticviolence.org we get a list of things that we should be aware off. For example there is a lot of tension and you find yourself trying to keep the partner calm before you think something is going to occur. Also if your partner ever hit you and blames you, or states it will never happen again the reality of it is it can occur again. Besides that if does occur again that is your signal to get out of the relationship. I recommend this website for anyone who needs help, or have any questions towards domestic violence.
I also think it is important to state that when guy friends also play rough with you that is not a great idea. Going to the college I go too I see a lot of girls and guys rough playing, which I use to do myself. However, this is an entrance for people to disrespect each other. Calling derogatory names to each other is not a way to play with each other. This can lead to a form of emotional abuse. Overall I think that boys and girls in general have to realize that it is not correct to "play fight" or call each other names in order to have fun.
I took the intro to women’s studies course this semester and reading this blog posts I found it very similar as to what we learned and discussed in class. We went over a whole section of violence towards women. It was very hard to learn and discuss because it is a very sensitive subject. But referring to another reason why you want to know why people stay in them is, we learned about the term victim blaming. This term means that women, who were found stuck in this relationships and wanted justice to be brought or just someone to know what they are going through feel they will be blamed in the end for it. For example, if we look at a couple of which the man abuses his girlfriend, if they’re with them for a long period of time, it’s hard to get out of it because of the attachment. And then they girl if she wants to leave will be scared because she doesn’t know what her boyfriend would do to her. That’s part of the term victim blaming. But the other half of it is they believe no one will believe what they have to say about the person. The person who is abusing could be known as an amazing persona and would never touch a fly, so why would anyone believe he smacks his girlfriend when he gets angry with her? This topic is very sensitive and it’s opinions and understandings differ from one person to the next.
ReplyDeleteI know from experience a girl in my town, who was really good friends with my best friend was killed this past January. I was absolutely shocked the first time I heard this. She was killed by her father, which really broke my heart hearing new like that. The way I saw it was I never would think a thing could happen like that. I heard her father was a good all around guy. But see that’s the trick with domestic violence, it really happens when no one would expect it to.
Also going back to the women studies class, I read a blog about this girl who grew up and died with her dad raping her. And she didn’t tell anyone because especially since it was her dad she had a feeling her mom wouldn’t believe her. For all these reasons it mostly comes down to the victim having a feeling no one will believe them.